Top Ten Tuesday #2

Alright, so I know I skipped last week. Life is hard. 

The Top Ten Tuesday is a meme hosted by The Broke and the Bookish. This week's topic is "Top Ten Inspiring Quotes from Books". (These are in no particular order.)

1. The story itself unfolds in the space between the "before" and the "after". 

-Lisa Cron, Wired for Story  

I like this quote so much because it is so true -- the character before the story began is never the same as the character after. Lisa Cron's writer-help book is full of amazing gems like this quote.

2. You are dust, her eyes said. You are dirt. You are nothing. Why do you bother surviving? Why are you still alive?

I am the dust in your eyes was the answer in Hathin's look. I am the dirt that will bury you. I am the nothingness waiting to open up under your feet. And I can hold on longer than you can.

-Francis Hardinge, The Lost Conspiracy

I love the courage in this silent exchange. It is the courage of an individual who has never shone, never spoken out, but who holds a quiet brilliance and resilience all her own. Of all the quiet characters I've come across, I would most want to be Hathin.

3. There are places that are truly dark in the world, Ven, but this place is not one of them. It's not really dark here -- it's just night.

-Elizabeth Haydon, The Lost Journals of Ven Polypheme: The Floating Island

This quote reminds me that the places and people my characters meet are never truly evil; there is no haunted forest, no Dark Lord. Everything is composed of shades of gray. It reminds me that every place and every character in a book is just waiting for its dawn.

4. But there are times

When peace just becomes

a broken mouthful.

A word that no tongue in the world

can pronounce.

-Melanie Little, The Apprentice's Masterpiece

This is not particularly inspiring, on the surface. It seems kind of dreary. But it is a reminder of life, that the world is a difficult place in spite of everyone's good intentions. And it is a reminder that these are just times, and that you can get through them. That is what this book is about -- two boys who get through the Spanish Inquisition, one of those bloodiest of historic conflicts. 

5. We believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another... We believe in shouting for those who can only whisper, in defending those who cannot defend themselves.

-Veronica Roth, Divergent

Okay, so this quote cannot be found in the actual story -- it's found in the manifesto for Dauntless, in the back of the book. But it still struck a chord with me. 

6. When she came to write her story, she would wonder exactly when the books and the words started to mean not just something, but everything.

-Markus Zusak, The Book Thief

I actually did not like this book all that much, but I have to admit that there were plenty of quotable things in it. This particular quote stuck out in that it reminds me of the power of books, and the way words have of getting into your heart.

7. Ordinary thoughts are pretty dull. Powerful ideas have a life of their own; they carry on, unshakable, from person to person.

-Jasper Fforde, The Last Dragonslayer

Fforde is an amazing writer. I love this quote so much, because for once he wasn't being funny: he was being thoughtful. It keeps me writing, sometimes, to think of this quote. It reminds me that these powerful ideas cannot be bottled up -- I need to write them.

8. Books have to be heavy because the whole world's inside them.

-Cornelia Funke, Inkheart

Yes, another quote about words. It is so true -- the whole world is inside a book. I'm sure there are several people quoting Inkheart, but that is because Cornelia Funke is absolutely amazing. I've been a big fan of hers since I was little.

9. If everyone is yelling, no one can be heard.

-Jennifer Donnelly, Revolution

I love this quote because it is exactly the opposite of what people normally advise you to do. Everyone tells you to speak up for yourself, for others; but Donnelly reminds us that sometimes we have to sit back and listen, as well.

10. If I win, I'm a prodigy. If I lose, then I'm crazy. That's the way history is written.

-Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

Yes, if you've been to my website before -- or simply poked around my blog a little -- you'll notice I'm a big Artemis Fowl fan. This quote has always stuck out in my mind, because it reminds me that I can dream big; the worst that can happen is I'm called crazy now.

So, those are my quotes. Now that I have laid bare my soul for you to take inspiration from, you can return the favor. Comment! Share your own stories, tell me which of my quotes you already knew, or the ones you'd never heard but you took to immediately. 

Have a blessed day.

    

Top Ten Tuesday #1 and a Note.

I should probably start with a note. Perhaps you haven't noticed, but I have taken a strange sort of on-again, off-again hiatus for a long while now. I want to reassure you, though, that I plan on coming back. Hopefully regularly. Life has been up and down for me this past year (starting last March, when my grandfather died, up through this March, when my college announced that they would be closing).

So, in an attempt to be regular, I thought I'd try a meme. I've been watching the Top Ten Tuesdays for awhile, and it looks like fun and an easy way to connect with people. And without further ado, I will continue with this post.

Top Ten Tuesday is a weekly meme hosted by the Broke and the Bookish. This week's topic is Top Ten on the TBR Pile. (These are in no particular order, by the way.)

1. Huntress by Malinda Lo. I am currently reading Ash, and Huntress is the prequel. The book is so good -- excellent prose and synopsis, deep, well-rounded characters -- that I can't wait to continue in this world!

2. The Story of Owen: Dragonslayer of Trondheim by E.K. Johnston. I am a sucker for a good dragon story, and this one looks very promising.

3. The Warrior Heir by Cinda Williams Chima. I've had this one in my sights for a long time -- it seems like a solid fantasy novel, with an excellent synopsis, but I could never find our copy at home. So I checked it out from the library.

4. The Tough Guide to Fantasyland by Diana Wynne Jones. Jones is hilarious and her take on fantasy cliches is truly great fun to read. I started it, but had to put it down awhile ago, and I cannot wait to pick it up again!

5. Ship Fever by Andrea Barrett. This one isn't really YA, but neither is #4, so I'm going with it. I actually have to read this particular book for class, but it sounds really interesting -- short stories all tied together through history and science.

6. A Spell for Chameleon by Piers Anthony. Again, not YA, but this series is pretty much a fantasy classic. My mother (who has read them many times!) highly recommends it, and says the puns are to die for.

7. The Wide-Awake Princess by E.D. Baker. I have loved previous novels of Baker's (including her Frog Princess series), and I look forward to this one.

8. Emily's Dress and Other Missing Things by Kathryn Burak. This one looked like a fun read, full of Emily Dickenson and adventures.

9. Poisoned Apples: Poems for You, My Pretty by Christine Heppermann. This one promises to be full of deep, thought-provoking poems about tough issues.

10. Agatha H and the Airship City by Phil Foglio. I had never heard of this MG series until Amazon randomly recommended it for me. But it sounds very fun and very intriguing.


How about you? What are your Top Ten? Have a blessed day.

I know, I know. It's a New Year.

Welcome to 2015. Enjoy your stay!

Last year, I made a list of resolutions to keep for 2014. Do you want to know how I did?

1. Finish at least half of my TBR pile. (The whole pile is numbering close to fifty, now.) 
2. Paint my room over. (It's my little sister's old room, and the most atrocious yellow color. Also, she left a few foul-mouthed messages written across them.)
3. Get my driver's license. (I've only got my learner's permit right now.)
4. Turn 18 years old in April. (That one should be easy to keep.)
5. Graduate in June. (Also easy. I'm pretty much guaranteed it at this point, as long as I keep showing up to school.) 
6. Work on my knitting. (As in, at least every week. Right now, it's looking pretty sad.)
7. Work on clay. (Something I've always wanted to do, but now that I have clay and space to work with it, I find myself reluctant to start.)
8. Put up some puzzles. (I have half a dozen of them sitting around my room.)

#1 -- No. My TBR list grew, if anything. Sadly, my local B&N has closed, as of a few days ago, and now my source of books has become mainly libraries. Happily, there is a library in the small town not too far away from my college, and they have an agreement with my college library -- so I don't even have to leave school grounds to turn in/pick up books!
#2 -- No. It is still yellow. But now that room is my mom's office, and so it is her problem now.
#3 -- No. I still have my learner's permit. Perhaps I shall always have it.
#4 -- Yes. I did manage to turn 18, at least.
#5 -- Yes. I did manage to graduate, It was great, somewhat.
#6 -- No. They even have a knitting group at my college, and I never remember to go. I keep thinking, maybe next week.
#7 -- No-ish. I worked on it once. This past December. And it never came to anything, because my parents are too busy to dig out the kiln and help me fire it.
#8 -- No. They are still here, waiting to be put up. Maybe I'll get around to it this week. Maybe not.

So there you have it. 2/8 of my resolutions last year. Aren't I wonderful at keeping promises. So, what's new this year? My resolutions? They are not quite new, I suppose, they are the same things I have been resolving to do for a long time. Namely:

1. Exercise more. (Say, more than once a month.)
2. Go back to college, study more. (Incur even more debts in the process...)
3. Blog more often. (It's been awhile -- where did December go?)
4. Eat healthier. (Not too hard at college, but near impossible in my own home.)
5. Get out of my (dorm) room more often. (There are plenty of concerts and such like at college.)
6. Play more video games. (Which does not usually feature on people's resolutions, I gather.)
7. Make some jewelry. (I have plenty of pendants, not enough chains, wire, or pliers.)
8. Keep my living spaces cleaner. (Everything I come into contact with becomes cluttered.)

I have a nice schedule next semester, so I'm looking forward to it. Only 13 credit hours, instead of the 16.5 I had last semester. (12 is the lowest required number of credit hours to be considered a full-time student.)

What else? My blogging, I hope, will flourish under a lesser school load. It doesn't seem likely, though, since as you can see, video games is another one of my resolutions. I think I might be able to keep more of them this year. My college is pretty big, land-wise (over 3,000 acres), though there aren't many people (the Class of 2018, my class, is less than 150 people). That means it takes exercise to get anywhere -- it takes about a 5 minute walk to get up to the library, for example, but it's quite hilly and there are a great number of steps in the way. (Did I mention those 3,000 acres are nestled a penny's throw from the mountains?)

The one I think I will have the most trouble with is the last one. I can never summon up enough energy to clean things, unless I am feeling sick. It's odd, I know, but if I am nauseous I will feel this urge to get up and clean the bathroom, or organize my desk, or do my laundry. Luckily, by the end of fall semester I found a new study place that I love -- the laundry room in the basement of my dorm building. It isn't usually busy, and the sound of the laundry machines is soothing. There isn't much in the way of desks or chairs, of course, but there is a nice table under which I can sit and go unnoticed (for the most part).

2014... is over. I am glad. I am scared, too, because I do not know what the new year will bring -- for the first time, I dreaded the new year coming, because can it really be better? The unthinkable has already happened, but is this one of those things where it has to get even worse before it gets better? I hope not. I hope I am allowed a break, to have a happy and healing year. Or if not happy, then at least the latter. The new year will bring what it may, but I hope for a few pauses in which to simmer and boil and have my grief come from an unfinished state to something whole. A part of me, rather than a piercing thorn in my heart.

So, here is a toast to the old year -- a picture of Odin and Mary Shelley. If you scroll through my old posts, you will see a couple pictures of them. They died November 2014 -- just a couple months ago. My older sister -- a wonderful, eccentric person -- was heading to her apartment in Lynchburg when she -- well, they said she must have dozed at the wheel; it was late at night -- she hit a tree. She and her two cats all died. It's been tough, these past few months. But it is the start of a new year, and I don't think Chelsea would have been pleased to have me mope about, doing nothing -- she always used to complain about that. I set a list of things I think would be simple enough to put into practice, and I lowered my credit hours to 13... and I can only hope that with this simplifying of my life, I can find the time to do my life well.

Have a blessed day, and have a happy new year.

Odin.

Mary Shelley. 

Thanksgiving. (Yesterday's Account.)

I am thankful for my family, (though we are reeling from loss).
I am thankful for my life, (though I am hurting).
I am thankful for the roof over my head, (though it's painful to be home).
I am thankful for my health, (though I've had a cold this week).
I am thankful for my books, (though I can't escape myself completely in them anymore).
I am thankful for my college, (though it is painful to be there, as well).
I am thankful for --
For --

I am thankful for my faith and belief in God and Jesus, (because without that, I would truly go mad.)

Angel (left), Tumble (right)

It's Been a Long Time -- Or, a Serious Blog Talk.

The time, my friend, has come 
To talk of other things --
Of shoes and ships and ceiling wax,
Of cabbages and kings --
And why the sea is boiling hot, 
And whether pigs have wings.
~Alice in Wonderland (1951) (Disney)

So, I know it has been months. You've stopped noticing. Stopped caring. Moved on with your life, as it were. I'm real sorry about that.

Right now, instead of bits of my own poetry or a book review or some fluffed out rant on romance or summaries, I want to have a Serious Blog Talk. Not the serious talk of I'm-About-to-Quit-Forever. It's the talk of the future and the past, of where I want things with this blog to go, and how I'll keep to a posting schedule.

Because I like this blog. I want to keep it. It keeps me sane, sometimes, to flick through my own sometimes childish or clumsy writings, and to write some more. And goodness knows, these blog posts are easier to read through than 50,000 word manuscripts, or my painful-to-look-at poetry.

My problem is posting it in the first place. I have a hard time getting up the urge to post. I shouldn't listen to "urges" or "the Muse" or anything else -- I know that. I should sit my butt in the chair and work. But this is a lot harder now, at college, where there is a ton of other work that needs to get done -- for example, the two papers I have due next week, or massive amount of textbook reading I haven't gotten to because I've been attending classes, working on shorter, more immediate homework like translating Greek sentences, or attending cool things like the Fall Festival, where we got free mason jars to decorate and popcorn and candy to eat, while sitting around having a normal conversation with friends.

The list goes on and on. And, to make things worse, my life has gotten sticky and sad. I don't want to do much of anything anymore. It was like that before -- before November, before college life, before high school, even. But it's gotten worse, because my sister died.

Chelsea, my older sister, was 22 years old. She got her Bachelor's degree in Biology this past May -- my mother, her, and me all graduated at the same time. We got to stand up at the podium, at the front of the sanctuary at our church, while a line of people came up to congratulate us. She had just started working toward her Master's this semester. She loved bugs, and free food, and drawing, and Dumpster-diving.

She died in a car accident November 2nd, 2014. A couple weeks ago, now. At times, it doesn't hit me -- I sit there and smile, and the thought begins to form -- Chelsea would love this -- and then I choke. What does random Greek sentences matter, in the face of that? What does posting on a blog matter, or reading a book, or attending class?

It's only been a couple weeks. It's as clear and bright and painful as the slowly-growing-colder air. Everything has to keep being arranged, when I want to go back in time -- to 2013, 2012, 2002. Some other time, before such a horrific event, before any of us knew this was coming. When we could have a measure of peace. When we were a whole family, complete -- because we can heal, now, after the event, but we will never be whole without our Chelsea.

But we have to deal with the future, no matter how much we want to go back in time. Life moves forward. My parents have to clean out her apartment. I have to continue my studies, make up the week I lost when I went home for the visitors and the funeral. I have to eat meals, and take showers, and pull out all these blasted sweaters and scarves and fingerless gloves. I got a work-study job, Monday afternoons -- I'll only be making around $22 to $27 a week, but it's money. I need to start thinking about Christmas, of what I'll get my family.

I have a mountain of laundry to do, and blog posts to write. I have a weekend to look forward to -- a trip on Sunday to Richmond, to see the Agecroft Manor or VMFA (Virginia Museum of Fine Arts). Later tonight, my friends are going to the movies, and they invited me.

All of this leads up to my main point, that this blog is going to look a lot different. I didn't want to bring my personal life into this, but it's a personal blog -- it's about books, which are as close to my heart as cats or my family. Well, maybe a bit less, as I've found myself more inclined to stare out windows and feel numb than reading books.

I don't think I can stand, right now, cheeriness and book reviews of lighthearted novels. I can't be enthusiastic about anything, not characters I love or fantastic worlds. I still love them -- I may still gush about them -- but I think that I need to take a step back, and talk more frankly about more. About my own writing. About the books I'm reading for class -- like English Women and War Literature. About the ways I'm keeping track of everything, from my personal reading to my class reading to my writing and personal time.

Poetry, I'll post -- most of it is spur-of-the-moment, stream-of-consciousness, which almost defines my writing. That's what this blog post is, after all. I'll probably still post book reviews, and things I find aggravating in books, like how ridiculous it is when authors try to cram a romance in their novel, for no other reason than to do it, and then don't even mention such a thing in the summary.

Right now, I have many things to do. I want to post, say, once a week. I'll try to do so. It's hard to do anything right now, but I want to try. So, I'll leave it here, and see what comes next week -- if I can keep to my word about this.

English Classes

I sit through
English 108:
Women and Literature.
More like
Women and War.

Greek soldiers,
Mrs. Dalloway,
countless women refugees

Somewhere,
deep within,
a tree creaks under the weight
of
death,
grief,
violence,

I should have --
dropped the class?
But the thought goes
unfinished

Because
it weighs
heavy and silent,
but so, too,
weighs the thought
that perhaps I
should join these authors
some day.

--JDM,
The Girl Who Sits Silent and Listens.

A Small Switchover (Or rather, a Big One)

So, I'm a college student. Hooray and all that.

But what I want to discuss right now is non-fiction vs. fiction. Because I am about to read a slew of articles and textbooks, and quite frankly I'll have to stop this whole "I'm gonna read in bed all day. For fun." attitude. I simply cannot afford to spend all day reading books -- novels -- in bed all day, when I have so much to learn and stuff into my head for tests and just general knowledge in case I do need it later on.*

Today I had Early and Medieval Britain. In which we learned some very interesting things (Cheddar Man, anyone?) but more specifically, my professor gave us a list of books on Celtic and Early Britain, Ireland, and that general area, in case we need to write a paper later on. (Hint hint, nudge, wink.)

And some of the titles look interesting. Lots on ancient Ireland, on Celtic Mythology and just Celtic 101, that sort of thing. And of course, it's likely to be dry reading. Dry as the textbook we have for class. And maybe a little confusing, as names change and there's no written records from that time period and etc.

But maybe I want to try it. Inure myself to the dryness of the text and engage with it in an intellectual way. What does this time period really look like? Primary sources are one thing, but modern books? Our textbook declares that this period of Britain (the 1st millenium, which is to say about from the time the Roman invaded to the time of the Norman conquest) is shaped not just by the Anglo-Saxons -- which is a belief held by a lot of scholars -- but by the whole of Europe.

(Britain at this time is very insular -- they're islands. Separated from the mainland, and not just geographically, but culturally. Rome/Greece was where the "civilization" is -- the Celts, for all intents and purposes, are stuck in a sort of Stone Age, despite the fact that they are brilliant metalworkers. I mean, they're known for painting themselves blue and rushing naked but for their shield into battle, where they are likely to fight with all the might of a mythical Berserker.)

And I want to learn about it. Ireland fascinates me. Mythology fascinates me. And the idea that there are no written records -- that all we have to go on are archaeological finds, like spears and shields and cairns and the like -- excites me. Because, like in literature, there is some level of speculation in this. It's not that my textbook is dead right and I should memorize it -- it's that I am allowed to read it and rip it apart if I like, or I can praise it to the heavens. I can form my own educated opinions, because the text serves the dual purpose of informing/educating me, and letting me decide myself if I believe what I've been given.

This is a revolutionary idea for me. AP classes, sure, tried to teach me that, but for the first time it sinks in -- I am an adult, and now I get to inform myself. It's not just doing homework; I am paying a lot of money to learn, and that I had better do.

And all of this is a roundabout way of saying that, for the time being, perhaps I want to set aside my fiction. Just for a little bit. Maybe just the semester, or just the month. But I kind of want to try my hand at nonfiction, at the reference books I brought with me but didn't think I'd ever get around to reading. At the wealth of knowledge waiting at my fingertips in our library on campus.

And maybe I'll share some of the less-dry ones here with you. My book reviews may be dominated for a while with non-fiction. Or maybe they won't. Maybe my self-imposed sentence will fall apart on me. Maybe I'll spend my time balancing fiction and textbooks.

But a small part of me tells me I need to learn to toughen up. Discipline myself. And where better to start than in my reading style? Like I said, I am up to my ears in student debt. It'd be a shame if that fell apart because I can't sit through reading my textbook. Inure myself to the world of non-fiction. Because I am decently sure that it should be worth some of my attention, too.

I have textbooks in at least six of my seven classes. All of them want me to read and understand. So I'd best get started.

*This is not to say novels teach me nothing and are a waste of time. Novels are very informative. They have taught me, at some time or another, all that I know of myself and the basics of human nature. And, of course, plenty of authors do their research, so I may take some of the general information and know that, too. But what I mean here is that college needs specifics: for example, one of my classes, my Honors Inquiry class (which is worth 1 credit hour, not the usual 3) deals with the history of my college. It used to be a plantation, there's a slave burial ground, even. But I need to research deeply -- through the archaeological and written records, I need to examine the real individuals who worked here, who lived here, and who died here, and how it is all of these people and their influences on the college founder came to the decision to turn this college from a plantation into a college. I need letters from the founder's father, not a novel set in this time period at this college. Because I am dealing strictly with this reality, and therefore I need non-fiction.

I love fiction, but I have never given much attention to non-fiction. And I think it is time for me to try it on, and the best way for me to do so, I think, is to focus on it for awhile exclusively, to get myself into the habit of reading non-fiction. That's my way of doing things: instead of trying to get it to penetrate my daydreams and bring myself to earth, I often incorporate it into my dream world and there it sticks. The details I need.

And also, by the way, this is probably necessary background reading. To understand anything on the history of a place, I need the knowledge. I will still be sitting in bed all day, reading books. But now, I do not have the luxury of reading whatever I want or feel like reading. I just want to pick up the reading I have to do, but also am curious about and want to read, also. This very long aside is because, while I feel a tad guilty for setting it aside, fiction needs to take a backseat while I figure all of this out and make some coherent form of sense in my classes.